The Longest Yard

This remake is an insultingly bad picture, suffering by comparison even to its progenitor (which itself was merely adequate). A collection of muscle-bound dunderheads smash into things and each other for two hours; this is supposed to be entertainment? The movie sticks Burt Reynolds (star of the original--get it?) into a supporting role, and that is considered the pinnacle of wit and cleverness. Both of those qualities are conspicuous by their absence, of course. Good comedy usually requires some pinch of intelligence, but in this picture they don't even bother to try, going instead for the absolute lowest common denominator at every opportunity. They make hay out of sadistic guards, prison rape, cross dressing inmates, and every other cliché you can think of from every other prison picture ever made. The ringleader in all this, of course, is the ineffable Adam Sandler. I know he has legions of fans, but I continue to be baffled by the Sandler phenomenon. He must be the least talented person ever to become a major star, lacking in my view any perceptible style, charm, acting ability, wit, or even exceptional looks. But he gets, what, twenty million a picture, so I guess the joke's on me.